Saturday, February 28, 2009

What am I doing here GOD?

Where have I been?

I ask myself that question, and can I answer it...? Yep! I have been busy. Busier than busy. I've had a lot of homework lately, so it's pulling me back from other things I can do. I had a friend ask me last night, "Vanessa, when are you going to get a post up?" I couldn't answer, I just mentioned, "Been busy!"

Well, what should I post about? I got two awards. Both of them from a good friend. I've been debating if I should post them up or not, because I really want to write a post where it'll touch a few of you. I can tell you about my life, all my issues daily, all my struggles, all the hardships, all the joys, yeah what about some positive things for a change!?! :) However, I believe I will post a question and allow y'all to give you answer. Hm, although, what should I ask? I'm pretty skeptical this morning. I'm not so sure what this post should be about. My mind lately isn't here, it's in another world. Going off. I have been in prayer and thoughts more than anything. At times I'll have someone come up and ask, "Hey, are you o.k.?" There's just so much going on, that prayer is the only thing which keeps me up and going. Literally, prayer IS the only thing that allows me to go at times. Sometimes I feel like throwing the towel. Or at times, I just want to get away from this world, take all my loved ones, join hands, and run away from all the problems.

Problems? Struggles? Issues? Hardships? What about happiness? Is there any in my life? Oh, of course there is. There is joy each and everyday. And yet, have you realized, that the negatives will most of the time try to out rule all the positives? Yes, that is often my case. I live in the third largest city in America, this is a very liberal city. The WHOLE America is liberal. Very worldly and dead. Not knowing where to go. I'm just trying to find my way. Asking God to give me all the answers. Because, these roads never end, they just go on, and I want to GO home to my God and I want him to take me out of this world. I may have just got out of balanced. Yes, I am crazy, I'm weird. The way I live my life is considered weird to so many I come across. So many Christians believe that, "God is my Savior (true), now I'm safe (true), and nothing, no hardships will EVER arise (false). " I used to believe this. God is full of compassion, and if I do this sin, and now I realize it he'll forgive me. Yes, very true. And yet, I love to do that particular sin so much, that I'm going to try just doing it once more, in moderation. Well, then you find yourself in it all the way and you once again, "God, I'm sorry!" O.K., we continue this, going on and on. God, I'm soooo sorry. There will come a time where God will HAVE enough. Then what? I find myself telling many this, "Get on your knees, quit your foolish sin, and quit believing GOD is a GOD full of love. He is, and yet HE wants us to realize and quit the sin.

I still find myself complaining too much. Or thinking of certain things WAY too much. I have got burned in this world so much-just like the rest of us. Some more than others. Some of the sins I have committed in the past and I can't even tell some. I'm too ashamed to voice it all. I have changed now, I'm not who I was back then. However, many times I STILL find myself trapped into thinking, "God, why can't these sins get out of my life?" How much longer will you tolerate it? Punish me God! I have got slapped in the head a few times by God (not literally), but he has opened my eyes to all the wrong doings I do and did. He made me realize, that HE IS the Lord. He's the famous one, he's the greatest one! He is pure of all sin. He has made me come to sense that he placed me in the 21st century, whether I always like it or not. I'm not sure if you ever get thoughts of, "I want to just get away from all this WORLDLY, deadly, sinful, disgusting, nasty, place!" If I can't even walk outside to my mailbox without getting attacked, then what use is it? Why am I here God?

I've been wounded in many battles. I have been hurt many times. It sometimes amazes me how GOD still loves me. His love is forever. Through the good and bad. Do I love everyone? Hm, that's a hard one. I like some people more than others. Oh, that's wrong, right? But how can I love everyone in this world? They hate me. Because I'm part of Christ. They despise me. Girls my age make fun of me. God, how can I love them? He carries me through it all. He guides me and always brings me back to reality, and to have the gift of LOVE for everyone. This is what God is teaching me, "Love the person Vanessa, and hate their sin!" Oh, that is SO hard. At times I struggle with, "Why do I have to BE so different?" A beautiful answer comes back, "Because of me, you are free, because of me you have the gift of eternal life, because of me your sins are forgiven! Because you LOVE me and know that your life can't be without ME!" Wow, God, you're so true. Why don't I always see this? Because I'm confused. This world tempts us. It wants us to believe in the lies. To fall down and away. Have I fallen down before? Oh yes. It hurt. It hurt not only me, but my family, my best friend, and my God. Through all this do I have the strength to go on? Yes. Shockingly and yet true, I do. Because God reigns in my life. Just as he always tells me, "You're mine Vanessa, my child, my beloved daughter, and I will carry you through EVERYTHING!"

And it's all because of Jesus that I'm here. Going through the streets of Chicago brings me to him. Going through any store I have by my side, because I need him there most. As I'm getting older, this world will try to wrap itself around me more and more. Trying to choke me within everyone else. Will I accept this? NO! If I wasn't so close to the LORD, then perhaps I would fall in the cracks. But I know that the strings between my God and I are not lose, they are strong. Stronger than strong! I guess I got my post up!

In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him. Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 1 John 4:9-10

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Maiden of Purity is one year old!

ONE YEAR OLD!

Well, it looks like my blog has hit its first birthday! I can't believe it myself, I have made the year mark of one year. I don't even know how to thank all of you who have become frequent visitors to my blog. For all the comments, and the lovely encouraging words you have left me. I appreciate it very much. This year went by so fast. I have posted 102 posts in one year. I have developed a friendship over my blog with a very kind like minded girl. Many wonderful things have occurred this year. As I begin my second year with this blog, I pray that the words God gives me will be of help and guidance to your life. I have enjoyed having this blog, many of the posts are insights God has given me during my devotions in the peek of daylight, or throughout the day. I have a friend, and she says my blog is the high light of her day. I would of never guessed this. God has blessed this blog, I gave it to him, on the very first post. I pray that this blog will be his, and he will bless it.

I hope to go on for another year, another year of 102 posts. To have new visitors, and yet to keep God's word marked all over. Thanks for visiting and for taking your time for Maiden of Purity.

And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7

Keep your eyes focused on Christ, and all your ways will be blessed. Every aspect in your life according to HIS will!

Monday, February 16, 2009

How can I deal with persecution?

There's something great about President's day...no school!

Alright, I still have my other post which I started on Saturday February 7 to continue. As I mentioned, I have many other posts to post about. I have many things I WANT to share with y'all, however, I never get the chance to get on and do it. That's why I'm happy about no school today!

OK, I left off on my other post here:

"Dude, look at them!"
"What, you have a problem with them?"
"No, but, look, they dress weird!"
"Oh, you have a problem with them wearing skirts? Huh, is that it?"
"No, I did not say that!"
"Who cares, just leave it!"

And then my final words were....To be continued.

Here now is going to be the continuing story. I was talking about the average style of youth these days. How they all dress the same, fix their hair the same way, and so forth. After that 1 minute conversation went on above which my friend and I overheard, she was literally speechless and quite angry too. I gave her the look which gives the impression, "Leave it!" In a church many wouldn't think conversations or situations occur such as this. Well, let me tell you, if you believe that, then you're wrong. Lets make things straight first, churches these days are different then they were back in the 18th century. Churches have changed. The youth come from all different backgrounds. When I heard those young guys speak about us in such a way, I wasn't ticked in anyway at all, I actually felt God with me and I had peace all over me. At that moment, my mind was made up not to get boiled about anything. Anyone could of said anything about me and it would of been fine. It was just a sign to me that anyone around us will persecute us. This normally is not me. I usually get angry fast and will go up to any and tell them. Well, God did a mighty work that night. I was thinking and just actually saying to myself, "God, you brought me here, I'm fine, and I won't dress nor act any other way then what I'm doing at the moment. You have told me to do this, if they want to condemn me, if they want to do it all, then fine. I'm going to act and dress according to your standards. Your standards are WAY higher than these guys, and most certainly than this world. I'm in this world Lord, but not of this world!"

Now, we can get persecuted in all ways. I have gone through it many times, sometimes it goes on every single day. However, you know why I don't mind it anymore, because it is showing me how I'm following my God more and more. Strangers are beginning to notice it. To me, that is a blessing. I have had a particular person once say, "I hate you!" Well, the normal human would strike back with harsh words, and fierce actions. Yes, I did that, but in the midst of my actions I realized what I was doing, it was as if the Lord pricked my heart right then and I immediately changed my attitude to a loving, kind, and spoke words of kindness. "Those who hate and persecute us: we endure it and return good for evil!" Wow, that is hard. Believe me. Literally, I would rather tell the person all the words in my mouth at the moment. Tell them everything evil I can think of. Although, what do you think that will do? It will just stir up more and more anger in the other and they will continue to fight back as well. This will go on and on, and on. It takes one to stop it with kind words. Instead of fighting back, try to calm the fight with calm words. This is hard, but with Christ nothing is impossible.

“… Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you” (Matthew 5:44).

Hard, it's very, very hard! I have had people tell me, "Why do you act the way you do? Why do you dress the way you do? Why do you still love me when I hurt you? Why don't you have a boyfriend?" These things don't bother me, what bothers me is when I tell them my point and they come back mocking me over and over for doing the things I do. However, this is no reason to burn up and then continue from there. I have in the past walked away if they continue to just mock back. "Those who defame us and despitefully use us: we entreat and pray for!" What, how can I do that? I want to do all the bad to this person. They deserve all the hurtful words! No. No, they do not. We would not be showing our Christian attitude, our loving actions. I know, this is easier said then done. Ask God to give you a loving heart towards others. Give me a heart of compassion, oh God. I have said many bad things to certain people in the past, because they hurt me. I wanted to hurt them back. I shot back with words. How I want to go back to that person and ask for forgiveness. I pray to God and ask him to bring this person back into my life so that I may show how sorry I feel. I have learned to bless my enemies, and love those that persecute me. It doesn't always work that way. I'm still working on this. Many times, these people can be our siblings. We still need to reply with love.

“Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven” (Matthew 18:21–22).

Forever and ever. Let everyone persecute you. Let them all say wicked things against you. Only, you turn back with kind actions. If you hear others speak behind your back, don't think hurtful things, and imagine wicked actions. Pray to God to help you stay calm and only walk away or turn to the one who spoke hurtful words and speak with love.


Friday, February 13, 2009

Oh my goodness...it came!

GUESS WHAT?

AMAZING!

I MADE THE MARK!

IT'S NO LONGER TWO DIGITS!

I HAVE MADE IT ALL THE WAY TO #100 posts!

100!

100!

100!

I made it!!!

There is just something so amazing with the #100!? It took me almost a year to get to this number! It's BIG news with a BIG number!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

50 facts about myself!

I have soooo many posts to put up. So much has been on my mind lately. I have good news and bad news. Lots of updates and just things going here and there. I got tagged by two girls, Lydia (Day by Day) and Allison (Letter From Christ). I am not able of doing the tag Lydia tagged me with (sorry), but I can do Allison's. Hm, I also have to continue my previous post. You see, life goes by so fast and we all don't even realize it. Ok, first things first. I'm going to get the tag Allison did and then I will continue the previous post. School life has been rough and long. Each day seems longer and longer. Alright, I can be here all evening and complain and just talk about all the problems and things that are going on, or I can get this post through with!?


Rules are: Try to come up with 50 facts about yourself as you can. If you're tagged you must try to do it! Its o.k. if you don't make it all the way to 50. You may use things from previous tags. Just have fun!

This will be interesting...I have a lot of 50 facts about myself. Don't get bored half way through.

1. I'm Mexican, German, and Texan (if that counts)
2. Jesus Christ is my best friend!
3. I have had about 10 best friends (other than Christ) in my life!
4. I'm a neat freak
5. I was a vegan for 6 years!
6. I have moved about 6 times
7. I'm graduating from high school in June 2010!
8. I have had the same color for many years-green
9. I despise bees!
10. I play in an orchestra with adults 30 or something years older than myself!
11. I dislike pink with all my heart!
12. I'm not girly at all!
13. I do not like to dress up...comfy is my style
14. I have straightened my hair only three times
15. I can't stand baking
16. I love the country...don't like the city
17. I love to email (check more than once a day)
18. I don't like TV-only certain movies at times
19. I turn the music up loud when I'm home alone, or with my siblings
20. K-LOVE is my favorite all time radio station
21. I laugh more than anything (sometimes)
22. I have flown in an airplane about 10 times
23. The words and phrases "Dude" "Oh my gosh" "y'all" and "What" is what I say all the time.
24. I don't like to play board games
25. Doing laundry is annoying
26. I have a friend who is in her 40's, her and I hit it off really well!!
27. I want to be a midwife
28. I pray many times throughout the day
29. I'm a people person
30. My name means butterfly so some people call me, "Social butterfly!"
31. I love to throw things we don't us anymore away or give it away!
32. I love getting mail
33. Tennis is my favorite sport, then basketball
34. I love wearing flip-flops, they go with anything (practically)
35. I used to want to have a Doctors degree in music
36. If it's -20 degrees outside I need to have my fan running my room no matter what the degree is (weird)!
37. I have been baptized 3 times. Once when a baby, at six years old, and then again at 15. I wasn't serious at 6 yrs. old.
38. I used to dislike dogs, I love them now!
39. I always have my hair up. Only on certain occasions will it be down
40. I'm not fair, and I still get bad burns in the summer!
41. When I was small I used to want to be a Meteorologist
42. I want many child
ren, as many as the Lord gives
43. I haven't seen my grandma in 5 years
44. I don't like Valentines day
45. My faith is Christian, none other. Christ is the best ever! Try him out!
46. I have one best friend now, she's my encourager when I'm down!
47. I share a room with a cute little girl-my sister!
48. When I have children someday, I want a boy named Chandler
49.
The Lord has saved me from many hardships
50. My blog is almost 1 year old!!

Phew, I'm done! Wow! I am going to try to post some more this week. I have a lot more to get up.


Saturday, February 7, 2009

Why are we mocked?

How many of you feel disgusted by this world and the people's behavior? How many of you feel that you can't even step outside of your own front door without having dart thrown straight at you? Is this you? Do you even get persecuted by family? Or from church friends? Have you ever acted differently around those who do just so you can fit in with their style? Do you dress different around youth your age who are of this world? Do you take their style?

About two weeks my friend and I went to this youth group. That was the first time I ever went to a youth group in my entire high school years. I stepped in that room and it did not take but 1 minute for me to realize that all the girls fix their hair the exact same way, they all wear the same clothes, jeans. They act the same way, they talk the same way, they walk the same way, they do everything the same way. The makeup has to be put on in a certain way. The jeans have to be in style, all the clothes need to be fashionable, and yet, my friend needs to wear it, many say. I then switched my eyes over to the guys. Yes, they did the same thing. All of them had the same shaggy hair style. The jeans which are baggy, and yet consumed a few holes. Hearing their voice was all cloned, their behavior was so similar and the way they walked was identical! Why is that? Why do they all do this? Most of the teens are inferior about themselves. They don't know what is right. They just follow everyone else. If you pay close attention they will not take the first step into anything because they feel shy and everyone is watching them. If one teen does not follow this trend of actions and dress you will get looked upon differently. I know, I have been in that situation a few times. Listen to my story.

Two weeks ago, as I was saying, my friend and I walked into a youth department. We dressed just as the usual day and yet neatly. We both were wearing skirts and boots. Our hair was not like everyone else, it is modern, but not straightened just like everyone else, it was left in it's natural curl. So, I now just gave you a slight glimpse of our appearance that evening. We walked in there with confidence and as well as being slightly timid. As we were walking around we both overheard a conversation going on between two guys, I'm saying they were my age (16). I slightly heard a little more than my friend, but she herself was already getting heated! One of the guys was going against us whereas the other was one defending us.

"Dude, look at them!"
"What, you have a problem with them?"
"No, but, look, they dress weird!"
"Oh, you have a problem with them wearing skirts? Huh, is that it?"
"No, I did not say that!"
"Who cares, just leave it!"

To be continued...

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Spreading the Gospel to anyone!

Ok, just like I said, this post will be about, "How do I start a simple conversation with a nonbeliever and switch it over to the gospel?" Now, I'm not an expert in this because I don't practice it as much as I should, but with the Lord's help I'm going to make it my #1 topic this New Year! I'm really determined, and as February has come already, I'm going to get busy very quickly. It's all in the Lord's hand. Daily we come across people, Christians and non-Christians. These people are all over. It's time to switch over and not wait for these people to come up to us, but for us to go and approach them. But how, you may ask? How will I do this? Is there an easier way to share the gospel and making it interesting to catch some one's eye? Of course! The Gospel itself is far more than interesting can ever be! Every time I hear someone spread it around I get the shills or just feel the Holy Spirit and get touched. It's the most wonderfulest news ever! Alright, but how can I start this conversation?

I bet many of you have heard about the Way of the Master? Well, if not, that's perfectly fine. It's this ministry between Kirk Cameron and Ray Comfort. They spread the gospel to those all around. The gang members, the drunkards, the prostitutes, everyone! After all, we all have something in common, each and everyone of us... WE'RE SINNERS! It takes a lot for many people to admit that they are wrong, and that they are bad. Romans 3:23 says, "For all have sinned, and fall short of the glory of God" This is true. Kirk Cameron and Ray Comfort have such a wonderful way of witnessing. It makes it interesting to the unbeliever and it breaks the ice quickly. They start off like this: "Do you consider yourself a good person?" Then the person answers. Have you ever lied, if so what does that make you? Have you ever stolen something? What do you call that? Have you ever lusted in your heart? And then, beautifully we can turn the conversation into speaking the truth. Many times it hurts the person when they finally realize how they have gone wrong all their life.

My mom once witnessed to 3 young men. We didn't know these guys and have never saw them again. Although, she followed those guide lines and she directed them to the gospel. It doesn't always mean that we right away lead the soul to Christ. It may take many weeks, or possibly years. However, we planted a seed, and then that seed will be watered and fed by someone else and then slowly it will begin to grow into a plant, and grow and grow. That tiny little seed isn't small anymore it has grown and is now a follower of Christ. You see, just a few words from your mouth can start that little seed to grow. It happened to my mom, and to thousands of you out there. Don't expect a person to change right away, pray for him/her and watch what the Lord can do. Many times it takes more than just a conversation.

Remember, the Lord is always with you, when witnessing to others, he's right by your side!

Go and wake up some one's heart, make them a follower and share with them the news someone shared with you! I love every soul and have a heart for them all. I don't want to lose a single soul. Sadly, many don't want to listen, that is for God to judge. We have tried, but constantly nudging and bugging the person won't get them no where! Give your best and place God always in the lead!

(This video is between Kirk Cameron and another man. It is a "Wake-up Call" for the man in the red shirt! It's very interesting and powerful!)